Palibe mabanja abwino. Ziribe kanthu momwe anthu akuyesera kuti akhulupirire mu chikondi chosatha ndipo ziribe kanthu momwe amalumbirira kukhulupirika, ngakhale mlengalenga sichikhala opanda. Choncho, kukangana, kukanika ndi kusagwirizana mumoyo waukwati ndizosapeweka. Koma ndi chinthu chimodzi chodabwitsa kuyembekezera mzere wina wakuda mu chiyanjano, ndipo ndizomwe ndikudziwiratu malamulo a cohabitation ndi kuthetsa mikangano ngakhale zisanachitike. Ndichifukwa chake mutu wa mavuto a m'banja, sudzatha kutayika.
Zizindikiro za mavuto a m'banja
Monga mwambi umodzi umati: Ndani ali ndi zida amadziwidwiratu. Moyo wa banja siwuneneratu nthawi zonse, koma kudziwa za psychology ya maubwenzi kwasunga kale mabanja ambiri ndipo izi n'zovuta kutsutsana. Mafunde oyang'anizana ndi ngalawa ya moyo wa banja ndi osiyana kwambiri. Poyamba, kulowa mu mgwirizano, anthu awiri osiyana ndi omwe amatha kuledzera, kugaya, kusiyana kwakukulu ndi kwakukulu komanso kuteteza maganizo awo ndi zofuna zawo. Zithunzi izi zimaphatikizapo kubadwa kwa ana, kukula, moyo ndi khalidwe la moyo, ndi zifukwa zina zomwe zingayambitse mavuto a banja. Ndicho chifukwa chake ndikofunika kudziŵa zomwe ziyenera kukhala zokonzeka komanso chifukwa chake nthawi zina zokhudzana ndi moyo wotsatizana zingakhale zovuta. Choncho, malinga ndi akatswiri ambiri aza maganizo komanso malinga ndi ziwerengero, mavuto a moyo wa banja ndi zaka zikuwoneka ngati izi.
Vuto la chaka choyamba cha moyo wa banja
Nthawiyi imadziwika ndi kuledzera kwa okwatirana achichepere kwa bwenzi, kuzinthu zenizeni ndi zizoloŵezi, komanso khalidwe la tsiku ndi tsiku. Kulota kumayamba, nthawi yomwe malingaliro akale samakhala owala kwambiri, omwe nthawi zambiri amawawopsya. Kuphatikizanso, kutsutsana komanso kukangana kumayambira, chifukwa malingaliro ndi miyezo ya moyo wa banja zimayamba kugwa ndipo sizili zosiyana ndi zomwe okwatirana amaganiza.
Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani? Kuti apulumuke nthawiyi mocheperapo, okwatirana ayenera kuphunzira kugawira ntchito pakati pawo, kupanga zosankha pamodzi ndikuyesera kusamvana pa mikangano iliyonse.
Vuto la zaka zitatu za moyo wa banja
Patapita zaka zitatu, okwatirana amayamba kudalira wina ndi mzake ndikuyesera kusintha zinthu pamoyo wawo. Ena amayamba kuyankhulana ndi anzawo akale, ena amayesa kusintha malo awo antchito, ndi zina zotero. Komanso, vuto la moyo wa banja, likafika zaka zitatu, limadziwika kuti ambiri amakhala ndi ana. Osati aliyense amachitira mofanana ndi udindo umene umagwa pamapewa. Amayi, omwe amawakhudza kwambiri ndi ana, amatsutsa amuna opanda chidwi komanso kusowa chisamaliro, ndipo iwo amadziona kuti ndi opanda pake komanso osafunikira.
Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani? Kwa chiyanjano sichikulirakulira, panthawiyi ndikofunikira kudzipangira nokha munthu amene adakonda theka lachiwiri. Ngati ndi funso lolera mwana wamwamuna, ndikofunika kuphunzira kudalirana wina ndi mzake ndikumvetsetsa kuti pokhapokha mwanayo akakhalabe akumverera ndi kuchita zinthu zosangalatsa wina ndi mzake.
Vuto la moyo wa banja 5-7 zaka
Popeza takhala limodzi kwa zaka zingapo, ndikusintha njira ya moyo, abwenziwo amayamba kukondana wina ndi mnzake. Kuwonjezera apo, izi zikugwiritsidwa ntchito kwa amuna omwe thupi lao lapatsidwa kale kuti ndilo buku lowerengedwa kapena akudandaula kuti chibwenzicho chataya chikondi chawo choyambirira. Panthawiyi, pali kusintha kwakukulu komwe kumapangitsa kuti awiriwa akhalenso ndi chilakolako choyambirira. Palinso nthawi ya kukula kwa ntchito kwa amayi omwe akhala nthawi yayitali ndi mwana. Kukhalanso mumtima ndi chilakolako chofuna kusintha chirichonse sichigwirizana ndi zolinga za amuna, zomwe zingabweretse mavuto.
Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani? Muzochitika izi, aliyense wa iwo akuyenera kusankha kusagwirizana, amene adzalandira zambiri kapena kupanga ntchito. Njira yabwino yothetsera mavuto ingakhale ufulu wosankha woperekedwa kwa okwatirana wina ndi mzake, i.e. moyo pa mfundoyi: "Ngati mukufuna kukhala, tisiyeni." Kubwezeretsa kumverera kokalamba si lingaliro lopambana. Ndi bwino kuwongolera iwo mothandizidwa ndi maholide ovomerezeka kapena usiku wokondana kunyumba.
Vuto la m'banja zaka 10
Izi zikuphatikizapo vuto la moyo wa banja 12 ndi 13 zaka. Zikuwoneka kuti patatha nthawi yaitali palibe chomwe chingasokoneze banja. Komabe, panthaŵiyi, mwamuna ndi mkazi wake amayamba vuto la msinkhu wawo, akukakamiza kuyang'ana mmbuyo, ndikuyang'ana zomwe zachitika mmoyo. Ambiri akuwopa kuti pali nthawi yaying'ono kwambiri ndipo muyenera kuyamba moyo kuyambira pachiyambi. Iyi ndi nthawi yachiwiri yovuta, yomwe, pakufuna unyamata, okwatirana amayamba kuzizira ndikusintha.
Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani? Pa nthawi yoyamba ya chidwi chaumwini, munthu sayenera kudzipangira yekha. Ndi bwino kuthana ndi mavutowa ndi zonena za moyo palimodzi. Okwatirana ndi ofunikira kuti azitha kuthandizana kwambiri kuposa kale. Kwa zaka 10-13 zimakhala zovuta kusunga chilakolako, koma kuti mukhale abwenzi enieni komanso osagwirizana ndi zopanda pake - ntchitoyo ndi yotheka.
Vuto la moyo wokhudzana
Wodziwika ndi mfundo yakuti okwatirana amayamba nyengo ya "chisa chopanda kanthu" - ana amakula ndikuyenda mozungulira, ndipo ngati atasunga banja limodzi, ndiye kuti muukwati pangakhale chisokonezo.
Ndiyenera kuchita chiyani? Ndikofunika kuti okwatirana azikumbukira kuti kusiya ana kuchokera kunyumba ndi mwayi waukulu kuyambanso chiyanjano, monga momwe zinaliri paunyamata wake. Ponena za maubwenzi apamtima, nkotheka kuyesa chinthu chatsopano ndi kuyesera pa kama. Ndipo kuti mupitirize kukhala ndi ubale wabwino, ndikwanira kuti muchitire chifundo mnzanuyo mwachikondi.
Kuwonjezera pa pamwambapa, pali zotchedwa zosavomerezeka m'banja.
Mulimonsemo, podziwa kuti nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta, ndibwino kukhala okonzekera. Pokhapokha mutadziwa kuti vuto lotsatira likubwera, mukufunika kusonkhanitsa mphamvu ndikumasulira mgwirizano mu njira yatsopano. Kumbukirani kuti zaka za chikondi sizichoka. Zimasintha ndi kulola kuti okwatirana azipeza zatsopano mu chiyanjano.