Kugonana kwaufulu pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi kapena anthu ogonana amodzi kumakhala malo wamba. Malo ochezera a pa Intaneti, malo ochezera maukwati zimakhala zosavuta kupeza womanga naye maubwenzi popanda zofunikira, kuyesetsa kukwera patsogolo kwa ntchito sizimasiyira nthawi yogonana - izi ndizochitika zenizeni zamakono.
Kodi "ubale waulere" amatanthauzanji?
Ubale waulere - psychology umatanthauzira chodabwitsa ichi ngati chikhumbo cha anthu awiri kuti amange maubwenzi awo popanda udindo uliwonse kwa wina ndi mnzake. Uwu ndi ubale weniweni umene chirichonse chiri "chowonekera" komanso chomveka bwino, chomwe sichitsutsana ndi madandaulo, nsanje ndi chikhumbo chokhala ndi mnzanu mwadongosolo. M'mayiko ambiri, momwe moyo wa banja umayendera ndipo miyambo yotereyi imasungidwa, kugonana kwaulere kumayesedwa ndi kubweretsa chilango.
Ubale wamtundu wa pabanja
Ubale waufulu muukwati siwowonjezeka kwa anthu amasiku ano. Ukwati wa boma suli wolembetsa ndipo umangokhalira kukhulupirirana pakati pa abwenzi, palibe chomwe chimalepheretsa wokondedwa kutembenuka pa nthawi iliyonse ndi kusiya, sali womangidwa ndi maudindo alionse. Zimakhala choncho, patatha zaka zingapo kuti banja likhale lovomerezeka, banjali limasankha kulemba ubale wawo movomerezeka, ndipo sichidutsa ndipo iwo akusudzulidwa kwa chaka. Chododometsa chotero. Kumverera kwa ufulu kumasokoneza mgwirizano wotero, ndipo kusamutsira kwawo ku boma kunayambitsa chiwonongeko.
Kodi ndiyenera kuthetsa chibwenzi?
Momwe mungamvetsetse mgwirizano wotseguka komanso ngati mukuyenera kulowa mkati mwawo? Ili ndi kusankha kwa aliyense payekha. Ndikofunika kulingalira, kuyesa ubwino ndi kuipa kwa maubwenzi popanda zofunikira, ndipo ngati izi ziri panthawi yomwe "adokotala atumizira", bwanji? Ndikofunika kupatsa ife tisanakhale ndi udindo kuti tisamange ziwonongeko, ndiye kuchokera ku ubale waulere wina akhoza kukhala ndi chisangalalo ndi zatsopano.
Ubale waulere - ubwino ndi chiwonongeko
Ubale wopanda ufulu wopanda maudindo ngati wina aliyense ali ndi zochitika zabwino ndi zoipa. Zotsatira za ubale waulere:
- ufulu ndi munthu aliyense payekha;
- Palibe zotsekedwa (kudalira) wina ndi mzake, pokhapokha kuti onse awiri ali okhutira mofanana ndipo amakhutira ndi maubwenzi awo;
- palibe yemwe amafunikira kanthu kwa wina aliyense;
- onse awiri akhoza kukhala ndi maubwenzi ena;
- palibe madandaulo wina ndi mnzake.
Zosokoneza maubwenzi opanda zopindulitsa zimachokera kuzinthu zomwe zili pamwambazi ndi maulendo otsatirawa:
- Ubale waulere umamangidwa pa chiwalo cha kugonana (kukopa, chilakolako), za chikondi pano sizimapita;
- kutsutsidwa kwa okondedwa, abwenzi, anthu - maubwenzi oterowa nthawi zambiri amatsutsidwa;
- chidutswa;
- nthawi zina kukondana kwa mnzanu kumakhala chikondi, popanda kukondweretsa, ndipo kupuma kumakhala kowawa chifukwa cha chikondi.
Ubale waufulu kwa akazi
Chifukwa chomwe mnyamata akufuna ubale waulere ndipo ngakhale kukhala munthu wokhwima sagwira ntchito molimbika ndi udindo, chomwe chiri chofunikira pa ubale wolimba. Mwachidule, izi zikufotokozera chikhalidwe cha mitala - mwamuna amayesetsa kukhala ndi zibwenzi zambiri, izi ndizo chikhalidwe chake. Kwa mkazi, ubale ukhoza kukhala wokondweretsa ndi wokongola kumayambiriro, pamene malingaliro asanatanthauzidwe, pali chikoka chokha. Mosiyana ndi amuna, mkazi ndi cholengedwa chokhachokha, ndipo ndi kofunika kuti mkaziyo azidzimva kuti atetezedwa, kuti ubale weniweni sungapereke mokwanira.
Kodi mungasamalire bwanji ubale weniweni mu ubale weniweni?
Mwamuna amapereka mgwirizano wotseguka pazinthu zingapo:
- Iye sali wokonzeka kukhala pachibwenzi;
- posachedwapa anapulumuka chisudzulo ;
- ndi wa gulu la amuna azimayi;
- Ntchito yake imatenga nthawi yochuluka ndipo palibe nthawi yokhala ndi ubale wabwino;
- iye ali wosungulumwa ndipo sadalengedwenso kuti azigwirizana kwambiri.
Pazochitika zonsezi zidzakhala zovuta kulongosola maubwenzi mwachindunji m'njira yoyenera, kawirikawiri pamene kusinthako kumachitika mwachibadwa, ndikofunika kuyesetsa mwamphamvu ndipo zoyenera siziyenera kukhala zovuta. Zokuthandizani kwa akatswiri a maganizo a momwe angabweretse ubale wabwino,
- kubweretsa wokondedwa ku zokambirana, kukambirana za momwe akumvera, koma osamukonza;
- kumupatsa iye nthawi yoti apange chisankho;
- ngati kukambirana momasuka sikuthandiza, ndikofunikira kudziwa chifukwa chake mwamuna akufuna kusiya chirichonse monga momwe zilili, mvetserani zifukwa zake;
- ayambe kusintha ndikusiya kuganizira za zoyembekezeredwa za amuna, kuthana ndi zovuta zawo, kudzilemekeza - mkazi wokwanira yekha ndi wokondweretsa mwamuna, uyu sakufuna kutaya, chifukwa ali nacho, ndipo akukula, akukula.
Kodi munganene bwanji kuti simukufuna ubale wotseguka?
Vutoli ndi lofala pamene atsikana akufunsa funso pazitukuko za maganizo kapena akazi: "Mnyamatayu wapereka ubale womasuka, ndimakonda kwambiri, koma ndikufuna zambiri." Kodi muyenera kuchita chiyani? Wokhulupirika kunena za izi kumayambiriro, osati kumanga chinyengo kuti pogwiritsa ntchito kugonana mungathe kumangiriza mnzanuyo. Mudziko pali wina yemwe ali ndi makhalidwe ofanana.
Kodi mungathetse bwanji chibwenzi?
Kusokonezeka kwaufulu pamayesero a mkazi ndizochitika kawirikawiri, amuna amakonza chiyanjano choterocho. Mzimayi nthawi zina amavomereza kukhala ndi mwamuna wake, kuyembekezera kuti adzatha "kukhala wodalira" kuti adzakhala wodalira pa iye, koma izi sizichitika, iye amakhumudwa ndipo palibe choyenera kuchita koma amulole munthuyo apite. Mmene mungasokonezere kugonana kwaulere, malangizowo:
- dziloleni nokha nthawi kuti muvutike;
- Pewani kuyankhulana kulikonse: musayankhe mafoni, mauthenga, musakumane nawo;
- kuika zofunikira patsogolo pawokha, kuwona kufunika kokhala mgwirizano wogwirizana pakati pa anthu awiri omwe okondedwa amakondana ndipo ali okonzeka kupanga banja lonse;
- ngati chiyanjano chakhala chodalira komanso chovuta kumaliza, ndibwino kupempha thandizo kwa katswiri wa zamaganizo.
Kodi mungapeze bwanji mnzanu pa ubale waulere?
Kugwirizana ndi maubwenzi aufulu ndi otchuka kwambiri pakati pa anthu a msinkhu uliwonse. Pezani mnzanu woyenera sivuta. "Gulu la maubwenzi apamtima" ndipo malo ofanana omwe ali pachibwenzi angapezeke mosavuta pa intaneti. Malo ambirimbiri, magulu omwe amapezeka pa malo ochezera ambiri amakhala ndi mwayi wopatsa wokondedwa kapena wokondedwa pamisonkhano.
Mafilimu onena za ubale
M'dziko lamakono, zikhalidwe zimasintha, ndipo ngati kale mbanja inali gawo lofunika kwambiri la mgwirizano pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi, lero izi sizomwe zili zofunika, achinyamata amayesetsa maubwenzi opanda maudindo, ndipo okwatirana omwe akukwatirana amayesetsanso ufulu. "Ufulu waulere" - filimu ya mkulu wa ku Germany M. M. Herling za abwenzi, abwenzi a mabanja. Moyo wa tsiku ndi tsiku ndi chizoloŵezi chawo chimapereka umboni wawo pa maubwenzi ndi amuna akuganiza kupanga "tsabola" - kusinthanitsa akazi. Chimene chidzabwera, mukhoza kupeza poyang'ana makaseti awa.
Mafilimu ena onena zaulere, palibe mgwirizano uliwonse:
- " Mabwenzi a Mapindu ". Jamie, khalidwe loponyera limaponyera munthu, osati nthawi yoyamba, ndipo Dylan, khalidwe lachiwiri lachiwiri, nayenso, amayika chibwenzi chifukwa cha kupirira kwake. Onse awiri akuganiza kuti ubale weniweni si wawo. Dylan akufika ku New York kukapeza ntchito ku nyumba yaikulu yosindikizira, ndipo pa eyapoti amadziŵa Jamie, woyang'anira nyumbayi, amayamba kukhala paubwenzi, ndipo chikoka chimayamba pang'onopang'ono. Jamie amavomereza kugonana, ndi ubale wopanda ufulu popanda kudzipereka kulikonse, Dylan amuthandiza pa izi.
- " Chilendo / Chatsopano ". Zolinga kudzera pa intaneti , zomwe zili ndi malo ndi zofunikanso zosankha wokondedwa - zinakhala zosavuta kudziwana bwino ndi maulosi. Ndi zophweka: kugonana, kugona ndi wina ndi mzake komanso kusagawanika, kuyesayesa mosiyana mwa mawonekedwe sikofunikira pa izi. Gaby ndi Martin adakumananso ndi ntchitoyi ndipo adaganiza kuti agone limodzi popanda kuwerengera, koma chinachake chinawakhudza.
- " Kuposa kugonana / Palibe Zowonongeka ". Adam ndi Emma anakumana zaka 15 zapitazo, koma ubale wao pa nthawi imeneyo sizinachitike. Adam amachoka pambedi kupita kumzake, ndipo kamodzi kamodzi kutumiza mauthenga ndi chilakolako chofuna kuthera nthawi kwa atsikana ake onse amamutumizira uthenga wotere ndi Emma. Iwo amakumana ndikuthamangira ku maubwenzi ogonana osagwiritsa ntchito pokhapokha pathupi. Iwo samakhala ndi zolakwika ndipo amakhulupirira kuti amafunika wina ndi mzake kugonana basi. Kodi ndi choncho?