Ngakhale kuti akazi amakula bwino, amayi ambiri amalota za chikondi, banja, ana, choncho amai nthawi zambiri amayesa kumvetsetsa momwe mwamuna wachikondi amakhalira.
Kodi munthu wachikulire wachikondi amachitira bwanji chiyanjano?
Azimayi amakhala ndi zizindikiro zosagwirizana ndi chikondi. Amayi ambiri amakhulupirira kuti ngati mwamuna amakonda, amakhala ngati mnyamata kapena wamanyazi. Komabe, izi ndi zoona zokhazokha, chifukwa kugonana kwakukulu ndi khalidwe lodziletsa komanso lokhazikika pakuwonetsa mtima. Komanso, kuwonjezereka kwa munthu kumalankhula za kusadetsedwa kwake, komwe kumabweretsa kusasinthasintha - lero munthu "wokonda" mmodzi, mawa - wina.
Koma apo pali zizindikiro za kumverera kwakukulu. Choyamba, izi ndi mawonetseredwe a kusamalira mkazi. Mwamuna wachikondi amayesa ndi mphamvu zake zonse kuti moyo wake wokondedwa ukhale wosangalatsa, wosavuta, wodekha. Iye sangapereke maluwa kawirikawiri ndipo samayendetsa dona ku mafilimu (ngakhale kuti manjawa ndi ofunika kwambiri ndi akazi), koma nthawi zambiri amapereka mphatso zowonongeka - amagula pulogalamu ya chakudya, makina ochapira, amapereka galimoto kapena kukonza makompyuta. Mwamuna wokondana - wogwira nawo ntchito - amakhala ngati wothandizira komanso wothandizira: amathandiza kuti agwiritse ntchito luso lamakono, amatsogolera ndikuwatsogolera.
Inde, amuna okondana, kuwonetsa okondedwa ndi maluwa, alipo, koma izi ndizosavuta kwambiri kuti ndizosapindulitsa kudikira moyo wonse, kukana munthu wina wodalirika koma wodalilika kwambiri. Apanso, tifunika kutchula - munthu sayenera kuganizira mozama za okonda achinyamata omwe amawotcha. Kuti alandire kuchokera kwa iwo chikondi chotsimikizika, maimelo opanda malire ndi maitanidwe, n'zotheka, komanso osangalatsa, ngakhale kuti malingalirowa ndi apamwamba komanso osakhalitsa.
Mwamuna wachikulire amachita chiyanjano monga munthu wamkulu komanso woganizira. Amaphunzira mkazi wake wokondedwa, zosoŵa zake, ndipo nthawi zambiri amapanga zolinga zowonjezera moyo pamodzi kwa miyezi yambiri ikubwera. Munthu wachikondi amadzichepetsera ku zowawa ndi zopempha za dona wa mtima. Kuti amukondweretse, wovomerezeka wa omenyera amatha kuyang'anitsitsa nyimbo yake yokondedwayo kapena kumubweretsa pakati pausiku sitiroberi kuchokera pafupi ndi sitolo yaikulu.
Chizindikiro chodziwika cha malingaliro a munthu ndi kugonana. Munthu wachikondi saika kugonana pachiyambi ndipo sakufuna kuphunzira mwamsanga wokondedwa wake pabedi, amatha kuyembekezera ndikuyika zosowa zogonana payekha.
Dziwani kuti chilakolako cha kugonana chingakhale pazifukwa zotsatirazi:
- Zochita zonse za munthu zimangotanthauza "kupeza malipiro" pabedi;
- mwamuna sazengereza kuyerekeza mkazi ndi ena, amulangize kuti apewe kulemera kapena apite ku salon;
- munthu yemwe amangokopa sakhala wokonda kutsogolera kwa nthawi yayitali, makamaka pambuyo pa kugonana - atalandira zomwe akufuna, mwadzidzidzi "amakumbukira" za nkhaniyi.
Ponena za kumverera kwakukulu kwa mwamunayo akulankhula zizindikiro zina:
- munthu wachikondi amayamikira maubwenzi ndipo samalola ngakhale kuganiza za ziphuphu zomwe zingathe kukhumudwitsa ndi kusokoneza wokondedwa;
- wokonda amamukhulupirira mayi wa mtima, kotero iye amafunitsitsa kugaŵana naye nkhani, kukafunsira;
- munthu wozama kwambiri amafuna kudziwa zambiri zokhudza nkhani za wokondedwa;
- Kupatsa kwa wokondedwa kumapereka zonse ku gawo la zinthu komanso kuuzimu - sataya mphatso, nthawi, kapena mphamvu.
Nthawi zina amai amakhala ndi funso - kodi mwamuna wachikondi angakhale wachiwawa ? "Nkhanza zikutanthauza kuti mumakonda" - malingaliro ameneŵa akhala akudziwika kwa zaka zambiri, ndipo lero pali amuna ndi akazi omwe amawona kuti ndilololedwa chifukwa cha chiwawa ndi nkhanza m'banja. Komabe, kukonda munthu wachikondi kumaloledwa kokha pamene muteteze wokondedwa kuchokera ku umunthu woopsa.