Ubale pakati pa okondedwa, monga lamulo, ndi wosakhazikika ndipo nthawi zambiri umakhala wofooka. Pambuyo pake, kukonda maubwenzi sikukumangiriza ku china chilichonse ndipo kumachitika ndi kuvomerezana. Ndipo ngati wokondedwayo atasiya, mkaziyo angaganize za momwe angabwezeretse.
Kodi mungabwerere bwanji wokondedwa?
Poyamba, mkazi yemwe adzipeza yekha ndizofunika kuganizira za zifukwa zomwe zimamupangitsa kuganiza ndikufuna kubwezeretsa wokondedwa wake. Ngati mkazi wotayika akadakali ndi mphamvu, chilakolako ndi chikhumbo, ndiye funso la momwe angabwererenso woyambayo kale ndi loyenera komanso loyenera.
Koma pali zochitika zomwe udindo wapadera umasewera ndi kunyada koyipidwa ndi kaganizidwe ka masewera olimbitsa thupi, omwe sakhala oimira ogonana okhaokha, komanso amayi ambiri. Ngati izo ziri mu mbali izi, ndiye kuti kubwerera kwa wochimwa kumakhala kale chinthu chodzivomereza yekha ndipo, pamlingo winawake, kubwezera. Ndi zifukwa zotero ndi bwino kutembenukira kwa katswiri wa zamaganizo ndikukhazikitsa chiyanjano, choyamba, kwa wokondedwa wanu.
Yankho la funso la momwe mungabwererenso wokonda, psychology yamakono, limalangiza:
- Tiyenera kuyima, kuyembekezera nthawi yomwe mwamunayo anali nayo nthawi yoti amve kuti wamwalira mbuye wake. Ngati ali ndi mkazi wina, ndiye kuti nthawi idzamupatsa mwayi wokhala ndi chilakolako chatsopano.
- Nthawi yopuma iyenera kugwiritsidwa ntchito mwanzeru, kuti muchite kusintha, kusintha ndi kudzikuza kwanu. Kuwoneka kwa mkazi ndi khadi lake la bizinesi, mukhoza kuyesa makhalidwe ndi nzeru zamkati pokhapokha patapita kanthawi, ndikuwona kukongola, kudzikongoletsa ndi chithumwa cha nkhani yachiwiri. Wokondedwayo atasiya kumuwona yemwe kale anali wokonda osati wakufa ndi kumalira, koma kusinthidwa ndi kukonzanso, zimamukakamiza ndipo, mwina, zimamupangitsa iye kudabwa ngati anafulumizitsa kusagwirizana.
- Palibe chifukwa choti mukhale obtrusive ndikupha wokondedwa wanu ndi mayitanidwe ndi ma sms, khalidwe ili sichikoka, koma m'malo mwake. Ndikofunika kusonyeza ulemu, koma panthawi yomweyi musabise zodandaula za kusweka kwa ubale. Kotero munthu amatha kumvetsa kuti chirichonse chingayesedwe kubwerera.
Mukamabwereranso wokondedwa, m'pofunika kusonyeza akazi akuchenjerera komanso osakanikirana, koma musaiwale za kusamala. Ngati adayamikira osati kugonana kokha, komanso kuyankhulana, ndiye posachedwa iye ayamba kuchiphonya. Ndikoyenera kumupatsa mwayi umenewu - kuti ndiwone ndikuyankhula. Akafunsidwa momwe angabwerere wokonda okwatirana, ndi kovuta kwambiri kuyankha. Ndipotu, mwamuna wokwatiwa akhoza kumva chisoni chifukwa cha mkazi yemwe akunyenga. Ndiyeno muyenera kudzifunsa nokha ngati mukufunikira wokonda kwambiri, wokayikira ndi wozunzika ndipo sikuli bwino kupeza munthu womasuka.