Pano pali mkazi kuti adziwe bwino munthu wokondweretsa, amayamba kukomana, kulankhula, kuthera nthawi, ndiyeno, mosayembekezereka, ubale umayamba kuwonongeka ndipo munthuyo amatha. Ndipo kotero imabwerezedwa kangapo. Ngati nkhaniyi ndi yodziwikiratu kwa inu, tiyeni tiyang'ane pamodzi kuti tipeze yankho la funsoli chifukwa chake zili choncho. Chowonadi ndi chakuti mwamuna ndi mkazi amasiyana wina ndi mnzake, monga chirimwe ndi chisanu, monga usana ndi usiku. Choncho, muyenera kulankhula nawo m'njira zosiyanasiyana. Psychology ya kuyankhulana ndi amuna ndi yapadera kwambiri, ndipo imafuna njira yochuluka. Ndicho chifukwa chake maganizo a kuyankhulana bwino ndi amuna ali mu lingaliro la "kulankhula m'chinenero chawo".
Ngati ife, okonzeka kugonana mwachilungamo, tikhoza kumasula zina mwachinsinsi za kuyankhulana ndi amuna, tikhoza kupambana bwino pomanga ubale wabwino pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi. Pachifukwa ichi, ndi bwino kuwerenga "chiyankhulo" chachimuna ndi mfundo za makhalidwe. Kuwonjezera apo, amuna ndi akazi ali ndi malingaliro osiyana a chidziwitso, nawonso. Chifukwa chake, nthawi zambiri, amai amati amalankhula, ndipo munthu alowa mu zokambirana zokha "pa bizinesi."
Malamulo oyankhulana ndi amuna
Tiyeni tiwone malamulo ena ofunika polankhulana ndi amuna:
- Amuna amadziwa zonse zomwe zingathandize kuthetsa mavuto. Ngati mkazi akufuna kuti alankhule, iye ndi woyenera kwambiri kwa chibwenzi chimenecho. Mwamunayo amayamba kupereka uphungu;
- pamene akuyankhula, anthu amatha kukambirana mutu umodzi nthawi imodzi. Akazi amayambitsa nkhani zingapo mofanana (ana, ntchito, apongozi, masitolo). Choncho, kambiranani munthu mmodzi ndi interlocutor;
- Amuna akukambirana amayang'ana m'maso mwa interlocutor. Lamuloli liyeneranso kuwonedwa;
- Amuna ndi ophweka, choncho "subtext" muzokambirana sakuzindikira. Ngati mkazi akufuna chinachake kuchokera kwa mwamuna, ayenera kulankhula zachindunji.
Kuyankhulana ndi abambo kumatsatiranso ndi chithunzi chosankhidwa ndi phunziro lofunsidwa, chifukwa munthuyo ayenera kukhala ndi chithunzi chomwecho. Mwachitsanzo, ngati mayi akupita kumsonkhano wa bizinesi, ndiye kuti mutengere bwino bizinesi yabwino, kukongoletsa tsitsi komanso malonda abwino ndizophatikiza bwino. Kenaka mwamunayo amamvetsetsa zomwe zimabwera kwa iye ndikukonzekera kukambirana kwakukulu. Kulankhulana bwino ndi munthu kumabweretsa zotsatira zabwino ku cholinga choyankhulana, kaya ndi bizinesi kapena munthu wodziwa chiyembekezo cha ubale wautali.
Zolakwa polankhulana ndi amuna
Pali nthawi yodziwika kuti amuna sangathe kuima mwa amai. Kuti mupewe zolakwa, ganizirani zofala kwambiri "zachikazi zachikazi":
- Amuna amakhumudwa pamene zokambiranazo zikuyamba ndi zifukwa. Ngati izi zikubwerezedwa nthawi zambiri, amuna amakonda kubwerera mmbuyo;
- amuna sangakhoze kuyima misozi ya akazi. Ndi bwino kulankhula za chirichonse mu bizinesi - zotsatira zidzakhala bwino;
- Amuna amadana ndi manyazi. Mkazi amalephera kusungulumwa, ngati sangathe kuphunzira lamulo ili ndi mtima;
- Osakwera kwa munthu ndi mafunso pamene ali wotanganidwa. Apa tikuyenera kuzindikira kuti kumufunsa mafunso ndi mawu akuti: "nchiyani chinachitika, bwanji mukukhala chete?" Ndiponso sizingatheke.
Malamulowa ndi osavuta kwambiri, choncho ngati mukufuna kukwaniritsa zolinga zomwe mukufuna kuzichita ndi amuna, sayenera kuphunzira dzino. Kuyankhulana koyamba ndi mwamuna kumakhala kochititsa chidwi, kosangalatsa komanso kolimbika. Kotero icho chinali chilakolako chokumananso kachiwiri. Lankhulani nkhani zambiri zamwamuna, zomwe zimamukondweretsa, ndi pink ryushechkah ndi abwenzi-blondes pamsonkhano woyamba kuti ayankhule sikofunikira.
Tsopano pali mabuku ochuluka, omwe amapereka malingaliro ambiri ndi malingaliro, komanso amawulula zinsinsi ndi ziyankhulo zoyankhulana ndi amuna. Makamaka ndikufuna kutchula olemba monga Allan ndi Barbara Pease, omwe adafalitsa mabuku abwino kwambiri pa mutuwu. Pafupifupi mayankho onse okhudza momwe mwamuna ndi mkazi angapezedwe kuchokera m'buku lakuti "Man and Woman, Language of Relations" Allan ndi Barbara Pease.